Posted on September 4, 2018
There is a value system on whom we believe matter and whom we believe are innocent. There is a value system on whom “deserves” to be abused and those whom don’t. Legally, the Justice System values some people over others. It’s in the way we tell the stories. It’s who we believe is innocent. It’s whom we believe matters.
————————————–* Warning: Trigger Warning*————————————————
Gerson: Um. (slouches more, rubs eyes and rolls his eyes). I don’t know. Not really.
Veronica: Okay, why not? What do you feel? Awkward? Uncomfortable?
Gerson: I don’t know. I just do. *smiles*
Veronica: Why do you feel uncomfortable?
Gerson: I just do. *talking to me* what did you want outta this? An apology? What?!!
Me: I just want you to stop touching me….like, I want to be your friend. Just stop the touching.
Ken: *to Gerson* Now is the time to apologize
Gerson: *stares* *whisper* I’m sorry
Veronica: Speak up
Ken: Well, are you actually sorry? Don’t apologize for something you are not sorry for
Ken: Are you sorry?
Gerson: Not really
Ken: But you can see where Boni is coming from
Ken: Well can you be sorry for what happened?
Gerson: I guess
Veronica: We are not out to get you here. Nobody’s thinking that you’re the bad guy
Ken: So, you have the floor
Gerson: I’m sorry *smirks*
Ken: See, speak up. You have a beautiful voice. Everybody should hear that voice *laughs*
Veronica: Yeah, it’s a beautiful voice…
Ken: So, do we have peace?
Me: *small voice* sure
Gerson: *rolls his eyes, scowls* sure
Posted on February 1, 2018
Maybe you’ve seen this sign. Or, maybe you’ve heard about it. In an age of ever-increasing political decisiveness, it’s nice to see these signs dotted along the streets in which I work and the locations in which I visit.
But (and really – you knew the but was coming) I can’t help but notice the distressing trend between the physical location of the signs and the socioeconomic status and racial demographics of the neighborhoods.
The places I generally see these signs are in the following places and spaces:
For example, I have found that it is much harder to curse out my neighbor than to curse out a stranger.
Rethinking how I engage with others also requires me to think a lot harder about what I hope to achieve from the situation. When I am centered, I find that my interactions with others remain healthier when I am able to check-in with myself first and allow myself to notice my own body and my own expectations.
When I allow myself to recenter and consider the other person as a neighbor, I also allow room for transformation to happen.
For me, this process requires intentional commitment towards leaning into relationship with others in respectful dialogue. However, this commitment does, for me, also come with precautions.
Posted on August 17, 2017
I’m a fixer. A type-A perfectionist that likes to keep her shit together. When I do vulnerable – I want to do it on my terms. When I do angry – I want to do it on my terms.
When I do whatevertheeffhappenedthisweekend…I want to eff it. I feel the tension inside of me that wants to polarize and alienate and condemn. That tension, for me, the noticing of it, the ability to name that when I am at my weakest, I want to turn inward is the part that sustains me because I know that by noticing where I could go when I am in weak reinforces my desire to lean into community instead. I know that at my core, my center needs transformative, holistic, diverse, shalom community.
But this weekend wasn’t on my terms and it wasn’t shalom-oriented.
It was finally a WTF moment for white America. And, I use the word “finally” intentionally because I think it is incredibly important for us to look at how and why this happened. This weekend wasn’t surprising. Black and other persons of color have been talking about racism, the alt right, the KKK, the system…. for years.
And, (***controversial thought***) I would argue that this weekend wasn’t just because of Trump and his continued inability to denounce the symptoms of systemic racism.
It is important to note that this wasn’t something that just came out of nowhere. And it wasn’t ever about the statues. The statues are a symptom of a much deeper problem.
Remember: The American system was founded on the bones of brown nations.
There has always been blood (or lead) in the water. And, it was planned that way.
So yeah, this is really us, and I wonder at all the good, well-intentioned white persons that use the hashtag #thisisnotus, or #thisisnotamerica because who are they protecting? Who continues to hold the risk if we all are unable to sit in the really big shitfest that is us?
Let me be clear:
Pretending it away only protects the system.
Pretending it away only protects those that can keep pretending.
The ability to pretend it away is a function of privilege.
So Charlottesville. You want to fix this. You are asking – what can I do? You’re that one at home reading and re-reading that quote “injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.” Maybe you’re that one still in bed with the mound of tissues and that pile of really expensive chocolate you’ve been saving. Maybe your numb, you’re at work, you’re tired, you’re exhausted. Maybe you’re angry.
There isn’t a self-help book to get you through this.
There are just other people.
Other real people.
Lean into them.
Share your tissues and your chocolates.
Don’t expect people of color to lead you right now.
Too often the white community relies on Black America to lead them through the (fill in the blank) moment.
Breathe and fight back (and, as a mennonite peacebuilder, I am advocating for nonviolence).
Reach deep into that righteous anger and find your strength.
Don’t just rely on Google to tell you where to donate…what books to read…what podcasts to listen to. While these things are important (and I will share some of these resources with you, don’t stop there) Remember that where we are now comes from years of a system protecting some yet always polarizing us from each other. And, it was designed that way.
If you have zero friends of color, this isn’t the time to try to be their best friend. This is also definitely not the time to try to quiet people with those cute sayings of “oh…you are not really black/brown…whatever.” (Whole other rant on why that is NEVER appropriate). So yeah, this isn’t the time to ask them what you can do. This isn’t the time to go to that black church and be the good, white person.
Instead – show up and interrupt white spaces. Talk to that friend, that cousin, your parents. Use your body by entering into spaces that you haven’t before…
Talk to other white people. Talk to your friends. Your community. Take a good look around the spaces and places in which you frequent. Look at your bookshelf. At your movies. At the places you get your news. What are the ramifications if these spaces/places/things are all or mostly-all white?
(In addition to the usual news sites, -and yes, I do check ALL newsites including Fox…whole other discussion on why it is important to know how things are being reported on all “sides”…in short, I want to lean into relationship with those I disagree with, and it is hard and trying, but I think critical…anyways, I usually check these out daily: aljazeera.com, theroot.com, poetsreadingthenews.com and medium.com).
Learn to interrupt hate. Part of this practice requires internal as well as external interruption. Knowing how to pay attention requires learning how to pay attention. For many white people there is a need to be innocent – to distance themselves between “those racists white people” and distinguish themselves as “good white people.” Lean into that tension. Interrupting hate also interrupts our own patterns of how we interpret and understand truth. If those we seek “truth” from are primarily of one race and that race benefits from a system that was designed to benefit them over others…what are the ramifications? What does that mean for those who wish to be change agents?
Get involved. Maybe you don’t know anyone of color. Maybe you’ve never even met someone of color. Maybe the first time you really thought America had a race problem was when Trump became elected. Maybe you still don’t know what is wrong but you know something is. Get involved by becoming more educated.
On the national scale, there are a plethora of racial justice groups. Here are just a few (and, you’ll notice my answer is particularly tailored towards those in Central PA).
Showing Up for Racial Justice(SURJ) offers resources to engage, mobilize and educate white persons on racial injustice. There are platforms in both central PA and the Harrisburg Area.https://www.facebook.com/centralpasurj/
Dr. Amanda Kemp leads workshops and seminars in which she advocates for racial justice and healing, by empowering cross-cultural dialogue on the issues. I’ve been profoundly impacted by a mentoring workshop she provides online and would definitely recommend each and every one of you, particularly those of you who are maybe not quite “beginners” to RJ and who want to develop your own RJ spiritual formation. https://www.dramandakemp.com/
YWCA – Racial Justice Institute
Crispus Attucks Community Centerstrives to improve the quality of life for youth and families in Lancaster by providing services that promote community prosperity, physical and mental health, and by offering programs and cultural events which preserve the African American heritage.
Listen & Lean In via multiple mediums. Listen to other white people. Listen to people of color. Listen in different ways. Try some poems. Below are a few of my favorite listening apparatus’ (and yes, I’m an NPR fan).
Our National Conversation about Conversations about Race – aka: Show about Race. Love this show even though it has been discontinued. Features Baratunde Thurston, author of How to be Black,Tanner Colby, author of Some of My Best Friends are Black, and Raquel Cepeda, filmmaker, journalist and author of Bird of Paradise.https://www.showaboutrace.com/
It’s Been a Minute with Sam Sanders.
Code Switch: Race and Identity Remixed. http://www.npr.org/sections/codeswitch/
Hidden Brain. Okay. You caught me. So, this particular podcast isn’t entirely about race, but I love how it talks about why we think the way we do…and that has racial implications.http://www.npr.org/series/423302056/hidden-brain
Books (There are so, so many to read. Here are a few off the top of my head – you will note that most of these are Black Literature, but don’t limit your scope. Stay committed, engaged and intentional. The scope of racial injustices is massive. Remember to engage in your own self-care):
The Hate U Give – Angie Thomas(YA Novel – Black Lives Matter)
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings – Maya Angelou
The Souls of White Folk – W.E.B. Dubois (HS/College Level).
For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide / When the Rainbow Is Enuf – Ntozake Shange(HS/College Level.)
The House on Mango Street – Sandra Cisneros (reads like a novel)
Brown Girl Dreaming – JaquelineWoodson (YA Novel)
“Why are all the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?” – Beverly Tatum
Young, Gifted and Black – Theresa Perry
Invisible Man – Ralph Ellison(YA/Adult Novel)
This Bridge Called My Back – Cherríe Moraga and Gloria E. Anzaldúa
Music. I feel particularly spiritually connected when I listen to music. Below are a few of my favorites…old and new. Feel free to listen to them…or not. You know what kind of music you turn to for healing and for sustenance.
Man in the Mirror – Michael Jackson
Imagine – John Lennon
Lean on Me – Bill Withers
I Am Light – India Arie
‘Til No One is Free – The Steel Wheels
Draw Me Nearer – Meredith Andrews
You Can Do Anything – Forever Jones
Think – Aretha Franklin
What’s Going On – Marvin Gaye
People Get Ready – The Impressions
I Wish I Knew How it Felt to be Free – Nina Simone
A Change is Gonna Come – Sam Cooke
Remember to practice self-care. In an earlier blogpost, I shared a few of the things that sustain me. You can check it out here. Christena Cleveland, social psychologist, public theologian, author and professor also offers some profound and moving practices here.
Of course, I am just one voice. And, I come with my own unique background. Dig into others. Find people to hold you accountable. Lean into community. Ask hard questions…to yourself and to others.
Show up for the journey and for the process. Stay intentional and committed.
Peace to you. Peace and discomfort and outrage and bodies willing to interrupt hate, voices willing to speak out and hearts willing to risk more than what you risked before.
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